Reflection about my earthly father

15 years ago, I was in Myrtle Beach, SC for the first full day of a week long vacation at a beautiful ocean front hotel.  We got a good deal.  I arose early to watch the sunrise create sparkling crystals among the surface of the Atlantic Ocean.  Bible in hand and a cup of coffee in the other, I watched a few stragglers walking along the shore collecting a treasure trove of shells.  I listened to the sea gulls call each other softly in search of food.  I watched a pair of pelicans with their wings spread float peacefully and effortlessly just above the gentle rolling waves.  The soothing sounds of the soft crashing waves made me forget my problems, my cares, and my worries.  That morning, it was just me and God on that 10 floor balcony that overlooked the white sandy beaches.  I was at peace.  That scene was a far cry from the scene that occurred later that afternoon.  Returning from lunch and a fun-filled round of miniature golf, I was planning on a relaxing afternoon swim in the hotels large indoor pool.  Immediately, upon entering the room.  The phone rang.  It startled me.  Once I answered, it did more than startle me, it shook me.  It took my breath away.  It turned my world upside down.  My father was gone.  Just 4 days from his 50th birthday, he had been taken from us by a massive heart attack.  I fell to my knees and curled myself into a fetal position and cried.  I screamed, "WHY!? WHY!? WHY!? WHY!?"

He was my friend.  He was my mentor.  He was my adviser.  I was so glad that I could call him dad.  The last time I saw him alive was two days before his death.  I remember his words vividly.  As he hugged me closely to him, he kissed my cheeks, and said "I love you and proud of you".  He said it for no reason except to say what he has always said to his two boys and he showed that he loved us and was proud of us.  He wasn't embarrassed.  We were in a restaurant.  He took whatever chance he had to tell us that.  Little did I know that would be the last time I hear from him.  Looking at where I am now, I believe he would say the same to me and my brother who is working hard to get re-elected to the Charleston County Board of Education in Charleston, SC. 

Here I am 15 years later.  It still isn't any easier.  I still miss him.  I still wish I could just talk to him.  Seek advice.  Go fishing with him.  Hug him one last time.  He is in Heaven though.  I take solace that I will see him again.  I know I will.  He was a Christian and it was evidenced in how he lived his life.  Other people have told me the same thing.

I love you dad.  I miss you and I am proud of you.

Blessings from Belleview: No Worries

Life for us has changed since we have moved to Calhoun County.  Our family has gotten bigger, unexpectedly.  We already had one oops when Mitchell was born.  He took us completely by surprise.  In fact, our whole family has been a surprise.  From finding out that we would have twin girls to finding out that we are having another 8 short months after the birth of the girls.  Throw in a dog and 2 kittens and you will find a busy and energetic household.  My exercise regime?  Chasing kids and pets.  On a brisk, October morning, I was sipping a nice delicious cup of coffee with a dash of cream and two small spoonful of sugar as I glanced out the sliding glass door at the 2 playful kittens.  The girls have named the kittens Tink and Belle, after one of their favorite Disney character.  Since they have wandered to our back door, we have welcomed them openly and with joy they greet us each morning, even more so when they know I will bring them the food.  I watched with interest at their little cat game that they often play, wrestling.  I marveled at their daring acrobatics as Tink leapt in the air and pounced on Belle with a seemingly vicious attack yet without hurting her.  Belle, who is now pinned, sneakily escapes from Tink’s firm grip and jumps on a nearby chair.  Tink, lazily wagging her tail, slowly eyes Belle and then yawns with disinterest. As Tink became distracted by a leaf rolling by in the gentle Autumn breeze, Belle lunges from the chair to return fire.  The game went on for several minutes.  I could not help but laugh at the antics of these two new additions to our family.  A few short weeks ago, they appeared at our back doorstep with their matted hair and scrawny bodies hungry, weary, and tired.  Now they don’t have a care in the world.  Oh how easy life must be in the life of the kittens.  They don’t worry about where the food is coming from.  They are showered with love and affection each day from 3 children who at night wait anxiously for the morning to see their beloved pets.  Not a care.  The kittens zip through chair legs chasing each other in good-natured fun.  No problems.  They climb up and down steps in what now appears to be a fast paced game of tag.  No worries.  I watched through tears from laughing at their hyperactive playful tenacity as they rolled through the grass.  No anxiety.  Now they are resting, peacefully after a joyful frolic with each other on our back patio.  Sometimes, life is never easy.  There are days where anxiety seems to be the overwhelming norm.  Often we feel we are pushed to the brink: mentally, emotionally, and physically.  I did not want to leave our bed that morning.  Yet, on this morning, I learned a thing or two from those two little kittens.

 

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. (Philippians 4:6)

Brought to Belleview: Up to God

As we arrived from our weekend visit, I reached into my pocket and pulled out the check that was given to me by a person who was there for the service.  The amount of the check was the exact amount it cost to repair the van for our trip.  I smiled as tears flowed.  My wife looked at me quizzically.  I showed her the amount and she joined me in tears of joy as we together thanked God for His gracious mercy.  A project loomed ahead of me at our home in eastern, Illinois.  I was taking a break from traveling to do the remodel of two rooms badly in need of updating.

I had enjoyed doing the remodel of our bedroom.  I was looking forward to sleeping in a "brand-new" room.  For now, we were expecting a visitor.  As the sun set on a brisk late February evening, I was grilling pork chops when a grey-haired gentleman with a neatly trimmed beard that framed his kind eyes and gentle smile pulled into the driveway.  I wiped the sweat from the palm of my hands on the grill rag and introduced myself to him.  We had only met by phone, this was the first time we met in person.  He was coming to meet us.  To see us.  To know us.  To see if Belleview was in fact God's will, he was the superintendent of the regional conference that expanded across several states and included Belleview.  We enjoyed the fellowship, the laughter, and the presence of the Spirit into the later hours of the evening.  We prayed and shook hands and watched him as he slowly departed out of the driveway.  My arms around my wife, my thoughts immediately went to the second room project that awaited me. 

All was quiet, for several days as I worked day and night on the remodel of the much larger room.  It was the room that we designated as the children's playroom.  I woke up on a Saturday morning in early March.  My Saturdays have recently been spent helping a local church with the construction of their new building.  It has provided me much encouragement as I have spent the Saturdays talking with the pastor and the men of the church in blessed fellowship.  Sorting through the mail at the post office before going to the construction site, an envelope addressed to me caught my attention.  As I sat in my truck, I opened the letter from Minneapolis.  What I read brought tears to my eyes.  Instead of going to the church construction site, I went home.  I hugged my wife tightly to me.  She looked at me quizzically again.  This was becoming a pattern of late.  I showed her the letter.  Here eyes opened wide.  Her mouth dropped.  Immediately, in humility and awe, we prayed.  We read and re-read the letter of invitation to serve in the pastorate of Belleview Community Church.  They were hoping that I could be present for the installation service in three weeks.  They were also hoping that we could be moved in by the end of the month.  It was a tall task.  It was in the hands of God to make the task possible.  I had a room to finish.  We had items to pack.  We had a decision to make concerning the house.  So many things, but we were in the hands of God.  I shared the news with the pastor and the men at the construction site.  In a Spirit of rejoicing, we hugged and prayed and laughed and cried.  God has opened a door and now we must walk through to see how far he would take us.

That evening, as we sat at the dinner table, my wife and I held hands as we prayed the blessing over the food.  When I closed the blessing, she squeezed my hand tightly but did not let go.  I looked into her eyes.  Her face glowing with excitement, anticipation, and fear all at the same time said to me, "I told you God was going to lead us to Belleview".  My mind reflected on that February Sunday afternoon as we departed from Belleview the words that she shared with me.  Before she let go of my hand, the reality began to sink in as we pondered the task before us in the days ahead.  As the corner of her eyes watered, she said, "Now it is up to God to take care of the obstacles".